These Facts Will Melt Your Brain in the Best Way Possible from brain scan Watch Video

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✓ Published: 02-May-2024
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A married man says he became “obsessed” with another woman after meeting her at a course - but his wife has since forgiven him after realising it “wasn’t his fault”.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;Ruth Perl, 58, and her husband David, 64, have spent 13 years recovering from the incident.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;David never acted on his feelings towards the person he fancied - but he chose to tell the woman after confiding in Ruth.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;He started researching an emotional experience known as ‘limerence’ - which means intrusive, romantic thoughts about another person. &#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;David realised his feelings were unwanted - he had no control over them and wasn&#39;t interested in beginning an affair with the woman. &#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;After telling Ruth about his realisation, the couple spent time rebuilding their relationship - and say they’re happier than ever.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;David, a couples’ therapist from St. Albans, Herts., said: “It wasn’t a normal crush, it was weird and disturbing - but we’ve put in the years to heal ourselves since.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“It was a difficult one - I did end up telling the other person, as I was encouraged to do so through therapy.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“I think she was horrified - in hindsight, it was really unfair to put that on her.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“But it’s all about forgiveness, we’ve done the work and are happier than ever.”&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;David met the woman he developed feelings for on January 14, 2011 - after chatting to her at a training course.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;Their conversation lasted less than 20 minutes, but David could feel he was “besotted” by her - without being able to put a finger on why.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“I’ve had crushes before,” he added. “We both have. But nothing like this - this was really unusual.”&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;David thought about her, night-and-day, for weeks.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;He looked online at forums about “obsessive love” - and came across a post about limerence.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;He said: “I thought, &#39;jeez, this is what I’ve got to a T.&#39;&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“Something’s not right - I was absolutely obsessed and I only spoke to her for 20 minutes.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“I kept going over every single word she said to me, every little action.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“The moment I’d wake up, I’d rehearse in my head what I might say to her if she came up to talk to me.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“I’d experience soaring highs if she replied to an email - and extreme lows if she didn’t.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“It was like an intermittent reward.”&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;Knowing the feeling wasn’t going to go away any time soon, he decided to tell Ruth - who also works as a couples’ therapist.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;She said: “David told me, and this was all going on about five days after my dad’s funeral.&#60;br/&#62;&#60;br/&#62;“I was in horrific grief at the time, and so my first thoughts were: ‘Oh, for god’s sake. 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